Evicted by the homeless

Ok, so maybe I do tend to exaggerate sometimes. Whatev.

Here’s the deallio. I was thinking of moving into a 2-bedroom place with someone, so I told mees* landlord that I’d be moving on out. I love my place, but just can’t afford to live there alone, so I’m moving in with someone so that I can afford to also pay for other stuff than just rent. (my landlord doesn’t allow pets, hence lookin for a new place).

[*mees is Irish for my. I figured since St. Patty's day is upon us...]

Well, we were in a time crunch b/c we needed to find a place by next Friday. She had a backup plan, but we were really hoping to live together. I'd been searchin, but just couldn't find a decent place.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch....
My landlord had made an appointment with this couple to show them my apt on Sat. But because of the snow-storm, they ended up canceling. They re-scheduled to Tuesday, but cancelled that as well b/c the woman had fell during the snow-storm & had what my landlord called a "medical emergency". (In quotes, b/c I think he's exaggerating).

Yesterday, b/c of the time crunch we're under, my friend & I decide to forget about finding a new place together. She's just gonna go with her back-up, & I'm gonna stay at my place. Maybe look for a new roommate to move in with me.

So, I call my landlord to tell him not to show the house, that I'm stayin. I figured it was FATE that no one got to see the place yet.

He pauses & sighs & then tells me that he feels that he should give these ppl 1st dibbs on my apt! I'm like, "WHAT!?!??", can't you just tell them that I'm staying so it's not available anymore? He continues & says "Well, the thing is that they had to cancel b/c of the storm & then a medical emergency". I didn't think this was a valid reason, b/c I re-scheduled seeing a 2-bedroom, 2-bath (with a Jacuzzi!), & 2 car garage house b/c of the storm, & 2 hours before going to see it, the dude called me up & left me a voicemail not to bother b/c someone just signed a lease!

So, I figured that was acceptable Modus Operandi for landlordy-ppl.

He simply hems & haws some more, & eventually tells me that he never listed the place b/c he had set this up with this couple, & uh.... they're HOMELESS!!!!

uh..... WHAT!?!??!!??

"Yeah," he says, "I was talking to this couple & they were telling me that they were looking for a place, & I described the place that you have & that it was about to be available, & they said they DEFINITELY want it. They were just going to look at it first, but they said they definitely wanted to take it. They're even willing to pay more rent for it than you pay now."

Let me tell you, I just love that my landlord doesn't care about credit checks. He doesn't believe in them, he says, so he only does criminal history checks. Uh.... maybe that's why I'm the only tenant he has that pays rent on time.

So, hopefully, soon I find out if these ppl are definitely gonna take my place. Once they see it to confirm with him. I do have a friend I'm going to move in with if they take it. My friend's got like a 4-bedroom house, with 3 empty rooms (soon). So, I'll live there.

B/c it's just bad karma to hope that a homeless couple don't get your apt.

Isn't it?

I'm channeling cantaloupes

Hi everyone. Yes, I'm still here. Sorry I've been all absent & stuff. Just a lot going on. I always have 10 days off work from just before Christmas to January 2nd every year, but guess what? This year, I spent much of that time all sick. Yuk.

That's the worst; well, for me anyway. I've told y'all before how I'm super-busy at work from November to March. Like, so crazy busy I have NO time for anything. Well, I look forward all year to that lil break I get at the end of December so that I can have my normal life back, & of course this year, I was all sick for the entire period.

Also, major life-changing news in my life: Mr. T & I broke up. This really is life-changing. We weren't just bf/gf; we were s'posed to get all married & stuff (this upcoming October). We'd been together for about half-a-decade. That's a long time to be that close to a person. There really wasn't anything we didn't share with each other. So, it's kinda weird when something happens & the person you normally tell that thing to just isn't the person you can still tell it to.

Yes, I'm still ending sentences in prepositions. Oh, & talkin about 'tions, I still haven't made a New Year's resolution yet. Although in my defense, I've been sayin 'yo' more often than I've changed my underwear so far this year.

Yeah, I know... it's hot.

Ok, so what else....? OH- Guess what comes along with a huge break-up? More hot-stuff... zits! Yeah, I've gotten one zit after another. And so now, I've got myself a binary-zit. That's when 2 zits decide to orbit around each other. And lucky me, it's right on my cheek!

I know.... hot.

I put up a pic of a cantaloupe, b/c I know that the FCC would fine me if I put up a pic of my binary zit. It's about time for them to make an example of someone to keep us in line; & I just don't have an extra $300,000 lying around, ya know?

So, I was thinking of my whole one zit after another complex I'm going through right now, & I thought of something. You know how everyone likes melons? No, seriously, there's a melon out there for everyone. I myself LOVE all melon, but I think honeydews my fave. Santa Claus is cool too, but you have to be in the mood for it cause it's so sweet. But I do love all melon.

Well, I was thinking of pick-up lines from guys (b/c all guys have them, & most are NOT creative). And thinking of melon. And it hit me! Why can't a guy who loves melons (99.9% of guys) also love zits on chicks?

Like, why won't a guy come up to me & be all like:

Damn girl! That sexy thing on yo face reminds me of cantaloupe, & I've gots ta get me sum cantaloupe! I just wanna lick it!

But nooooo, I'm not hearing that. Weird, huh?

Oh, & this post is dedicated to Jen, who's been asking me for months to update. Holla!

love me tender, love me true

Ok, I’m gonna tell you guys something. For the last 4 years, I’ve been investigating 2 ppl at my work. You see, 4 years ago, this elderly man who used to do business at my company told me that one of the women here had “kissed” Elvis. Yes, the Elvis.

So, I narrowed it down to 2 women. They were of the right age, & audacity. I mean, these are 2 spunky, outspoken broads*.

I knew that one of them would be leaving sometime in the coming year, so I figured I had a year to figure it out. Yes folks, I had turned this into my very own Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler.

So, today I learn that 3 women at my company are retiring. Two are the initial two suspects, & the 3rd is a new-comer to the race. She had always worked at the company, it's just that I didn't know her that well in the beginning. In the last year, I've gotten to know her, & she could also have done the deed.

If you guys don't know, I have this compulsion to need to know things. Things that are interesting, things that are none of my business, just THINGS. I mean, take a look at my sidebar, & how many links I have under "Media Stuff" or "Celeb Stuff".

So, wish me luck, b/c my detectiving is abouts ta hit overdrive.

why ask?

Ok, so this might be like 15 years late in my asking this....

But we've all heard that lil tongue twister....

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Um.... who came up w/ this? Why ask?

If it can't chuck wood, it's like saying

"how many years can you go w/out breathing air if you could go years w/out breathing air?"

So, this just is the randomness that pops into my head that I normally don't share w/ anyone ever.

But I'm just posting it now cause I'm off to Cinci for a day & a half, & I wanted the 'Bron off the top of my page. Peace out yo.

heads of state

I'd written about Mahmoud Ahmadinejad before. He had said then that he wouldn't do Oli Stone's doc b/c he wants nothing to do w/ the US b/c anything to do w/ the US relates to "the Great Satan".

Sooooo.... um, isn't Columbia University in the US? So, why'd he do that? You know what I really wanna know that I can't seem find out? How much did they pay him to appear & speak?

You know what I mean? Seriously, even if you wanted Carrot Top to come to your school to speak, you'd have to pay him, & put him up in swanky digs & stuff. So, how much? And the students are ok w/ having contributed to his income?

Y'all remember the tasering that happened at John Kerry's todo at the University of Florida last week? I mean, they freakin tasered him! He just didn't agree w/ Kerry. I mean, his tuition & fees helped bring Kerry there, so he's got a right to say what he wants. I think The Idea of Progress did a great post on it. Yes, he got carried away, & shoulda been removed b/c he was getting in the way of the others who also contributed & actually did want to hear what the Ker-ster had to say. But to TASER him; that's just sickening. I've written about another tasering at a sunny school before too; & so y'all know I'm just pretty anti-tasering.

But the Columbia president paid Ahmadinejad to come to speak there, & then just bent him over & spanked him? If we're going to taser anyone who is adamantly against whoever we pay to come speak at the school, shouldn't that be consistent?

The kid paying tuition & fees gets tasered. The president who collects his income from the tuition & fees doesn't. I'm not saying he shoulda got tasered. I'm saying the kid shouldn't have.

I hate inconsistencies. Ahmadinejad saying he wants nothing to do w/ the US, then coming here to speak. Someone getting tasered for causing a scene at a lecture, & someone else being commended for it (even though he himself paid big money to the offender?). What's up w/ all dat yo?!?!

Oh, yeah, & then Evo Morales spoke at Cooper Union on Monday, & said that capitalism is "the worst enemy of humanity". He got thunderous applause from the 200 students that came to hear him speak. So, don't tell me it has anything to do w/ denouncing our way of life. Maybe it's just cause they're such a hippie school.

Sidenote: don't think I'm anti Evo, cause I'm not. I think it's cool that a poor farmer w/ no "formal education" can become president. I put "formal education" in quotes not b/c I love quotes so much, but b/c I don’t think a person’s intelligence or common sense comes is relative to the level of his degree. There are so many ppl among us who may not have formal training, but may be smarter or more qualified than those with a doctoral degree. But that’s a post for another day. Or not (you know how lazy I can be about posting).

ism-ing all over the place

If you are one of those ppl who say that you will only marry a member of your own race/ethnicity, does that make you racist? B/c you are closing yourself off of others simply based on race?

If so....

Then if you're a female, & would only consider dating/marrying a male. Or, if you're male & will only consider dating/marrying a female, does that make you sexist? B/c you're completely not willing to open yourself up to the possibility simply based on the sex of the person?

stop squirrelling around

haha, get it? Squirrel-ling around? Squirrel? heehee. hahaha.

Sorry, I'm in a bit of a silly mood this morn. So, you wanna know what I saw yesterday? Well, I was on the phone w/ Mr. T; so I went out to our patio area at work so I can talk to him in peace. Yesterday was a pretty warm day here in Cleve. It was probably like 95-98 w/ the heat index factored in.

Just like 3 feet in front of me is this drainage thing (b/c they really do over-water the foliage here). It was in the shade, so I figured the metal had to be all niiiiice & coooool. Why else would this squirrel decide to sprawl himself out on it? This sight really cracked me up.Oh, & I just got a new phone a couple of weeks ago. It's the LG enV and it’s just the coolest thing EV-ER. It’s got an amazing camera on it, & the pic above was taken on my cute new lil camera phone. Did I mention it’s orange? So. CUTE! I’m calling it butternut though, I have a wallet that’s orange too, but on the label, it didn’t say orange, it said butternut. So, since the phone matches the wallet ex-act-ly, I’m calling the phone butternut too.

See? Now you get it. Squirrelling around! heehee.

brew-ha-ha

So, you remember when I told y'all about the Magically Mystery Brewery Tour that I was part of? Well, this month's stop was supposed to be the Northfield Park Brewery. Being the dedicated individual that I am, I went to their website to do some research. I needed directions, but I like to investigate what types of beers they have so I can prepare for the night.

In particular, 2 brews they had jumped out at me:
WINNERS WHEAT LAGER - A refreshing, unfiltered lager for those who know how to pick ‘em! It is made with kiln-dried, malted Belgian wheat and accented with domestic barley and imported hops. Winners Wheat is brewed in the German tradition with a light body and a fruity aroma.

...and...

SILKS CREAM ALE - As smooth and crisp as a new set of silks! Made with Belgian malts and domestic hops, this beer is brewed for the American palate. The rich, creamy head accents the bright, golden ale. Silks Cream Ale is lightly carbonated and has a mild taste with a clean hop finish.

Now, I do love Belgium-style wheat beers (like Blue Moon, or Hoegaarden, & Chimay- but that's not a wheat beir, I don't think), so I knew I'd like the 1st one. And the 2nd one brings to mind A&W Cream Soda (I know, only b/c it has cream in the title), but it made me curious.

So, I get to the website, & at the top it says in all caps:

"PLEASE NOTE -- WE ARE CURRENTLY REVAMPING OUR MICROBREWERY STAFFING AND PRODUCTION PROCESS.
MICROBREWS ARE CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE. WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE."

What!?!

So, I shoot off an email to them to see how updated this site is. You know, maybe they're back up & running. The email comes back to me as undeliverable. This is not a good sign.

Next step, I decide to call. Yes, I'm at work on Friday afternoon. But I had to scramble, the brewery stop was the following evening, & a mass # of ppls were going to head from all different directions for naught if I didn't act fast*. I got this recording. Yes, that's not unusual. Here's the strange part...

Are you ready for this? (I can't believe someone may still be reading this far down). The recording was a BRITISH WOMAN! Um, this is NE Ohio. Yeah, that's all I've got. But it was weird.

Turns out I did talk to a couple of ppl there, & we're going to have to re-schedule our beer stop cause they closed down the microbrewery w/ no plans to re-open soon.

Am I a hero for finding this all out in the nick of time? Did I feel like a hero? Well, I don't really buy into the whole labeling thing, but....

*This may be a slight exaggeration.

yea-grey

Um, you know how the British spelling differs from the American?

The British spell it 'grey', Americans--'gray'. And of course, we all know the 're' instead of 'er' at the end of such classics as 'theatre'; or the 'our' instead of 'or' in colour, behaviour, etc.

Well, is 'yay' the American way of spelling 'yea'? I've always spelled it 'yea'. Mainly cause I learned British-English growing up. I think. In primary school, they beat the ‘our’s & the ‘re’s right outta me. Well, ok, so they didn’t beat me here in the States*. But they def worked their patooties off to re-condition me to spell things the American way instead of the British way.

Um, does anyone else also call it 'primary school'? Grammar school? Grade school? Anyone?

But I guess they never noticed the ‘grey’. Maybe I just didn’t use it back then. I mean, how many 8 year olds use the word grey? I use it all the time now, complaining about yanking out yet another couple of hairs. So, it hasn’t been til recent years that I even noticed that it’s correct to spell it ‘gray’ as well.

But what about ‘yay’? Is that the same thing? Or, is it just these young punks now-a-days. W/ their adding words like ain’t, bootylicious, & google (as a verb) to our dictionaries?

*Although when I was in preschool overseas, my teacher used to threaten to tie me to the ceiling fan at least twice (or thrice) a week. No kidding. My mom & grandma had to go to school on several separate occasions to ask her to stop.

Aside: I was trying not to post b/c I wanted to keep the link to write about the crisis in the Dafur region at the top of my page; but please do scroll down & click on the link to help. Amnesty is trying to get a massive amount of letters to Washington by Monday.

pink elephant

There’s this woman at work. I’ve been working w/ her for over 3 years now. In the last 2 years, she’s seemed to put on weight; just a little weight, mind you. Well, in the last few months, she’s put on a bit more weight, & had developed an ever-increasing belly. A lot of times, women who find themselves w/ a bit of a belly try to hide it. Esp b/c they’re not used to having it, & they don’t really care for it. They do it more for themselves than for other ppl.

So, this woman. She’s been walking around w/ this belly now for the last 2 months. I just ignored it.

Oh, total sidenote: In my fam, they are not shy about mentioning these kinds of things. Once, I went to see my uncle after not seeing him for a year, & the 1st words out of his mouth were “Wow, it looks like you’ve put on some weight there? You need to exercise more.” No, I’m not kidding, you can’t make this stuff up. Oh, & btw, I’d gained about 10 pounds (maybe 8). And I wasn’t fat to start off w/. Yeah, they don’t like weight gain. But it’s better than my other uncle, who’s come to visit us from overseas, & hasn’t seen a lot of us in 15 years. He went to see my cousins, & mentioned how two of them had become “fatties”. So nonchalantly too. He’ll just say, “oh yeah, & we saw ‘so & so’ today, he’s turned into a bit of a fattie, hasn’t he?”, then ask when we were going to make his tea for his ‘4 pm tea-time’. B/c he doesn’t know how to make TEA!!! TEA, ppl!?!

Ok, back to the subject at hand. Yesterday, I saw her & she was wearing (what looked to me like) a pink maternity top. Now, I realize maybe she hasn’t been slingin back the Pabst Blue Ribbons. Maybe she’s pregnant. I mean, she’s married, young-ish, has a dog, & they just bought a house 2 years ago. No, I don’t know what the dog has to do w/ anything. At the time, I thought they’d moved into the house from the apt so that the dog had space to run around in. Now, it’s occurring to me that maybe they bought the house in preparation for a baby.

So, I still haven’t asked if she is or not. I don’t want to say anything about it, b/c what if she’s not? She’s a decent person. That, & the fact that when I request changes be made, she’s the person who decides what priority to give my requests; which in turn affects whether my requisitions are fulfilled in the next 48 hours or 8 months. Ok, more the latter reason; but still, I don’t want to hurt her feelings or upset her.

This is my current “pink elephant in the room & you can’t talk about it” situation. Literally & figuratively.

aren't rainbows purty?

Does anyone else go stand outside in the rain when it's sunny looking for rainbows? Last Sat, we had one of those days here. I just finished working out, & it'd been rainy & grey all morn. Well, I was almost done, when I looked out the window & saw that it had become sunny. It was still raining, but in the beautiful sunshine. So, I finished up & hightailed it outta there. On my way out, the lady at the desk (they all know me so well in my town) saw me fixated on the windows of the door as I was headin towards it, & said to me “You’re going to look for the rainbow, aren’t you?”. I said “yup” (I’m a girl of few words. haha, ok, so I’m not, but when I’m focused on something I can be.) She said I needed to come back in & tell her what it was like before I actually left. So, I walked outside, & had to look around for it. I couldn’t find it anywhere. It took an 8 year old boy riding his bike through the parking lot to help me find it; “look over there”. So, I did.

It was a short stubby rainbow. Wide, but short. I’d never seen one like that before. I could see both ends of it, & the top of it was so low to the ground. Very cool. So, if it’s sunny & raining, high-tail it outside to see one of these babies, ‘kay? Cause no two are alike, & if you miss it, that’s it. There’s no instant replay on ‘em.

Then, this morning, I check my email, & my friend Jen sent me this awesome pic. Thanks, baby-doll! How cool is that?!? So, I’m sharing w/ y’all.

yes, I'm fab

Ahhhh, to be ghetto-fabulous. I know a lot of ppl use this term, applying it to others, but I think it’s over-used & not in the proper way. Now, yesterday, I can honestly say that I felt ghetto-fabulous.

I had just gotten these new Liz Clay wedges. Now, wait, give me a min to explain. These are not part of the ghetto-fabulosity. BUT, in getting these new sandals, I carried myself a little higher, & there was a slight sash-shay to my walk.

So, during my lunch hour, when it’s nice outside, I like to stroll around. So, I walk up one street & down the other, to this area where there are a few granite benches to sit, eat my lunch there, & eventually drag myself back to work. Now, I should add here that I don’t work in a shady neighborhood or anything like that, buuuut, if you go down a couple of blocks, you’re instantly in the inner-city. I’m talking hard-core, drive-by shooting, 2 arsons killing 8 kids in the last 2 months inner city. Our PR department is pretty good about drawing attention away from that though.

So, I was strolling back to the building, as slowly as I could, b/c I really was in no hurry to get back. I saw a shuttle bus go by me. No biggie, right? These shuttles go by all the time. Well, 4 mins later, it comes back from behind me. It had turned around, & is now going in the same direction as I am. It stops, & the driver opens the door, & says something to me. I have pretty bad hearing (plus the bus was loud), so I’m assuming what he said was something to the effect of “hop on, do you need a ride?”. I heard a combination of a few of those words. I just said ‘no thank you, I’m enjoying the day, & I’d like to just walk’. He then tipped his hat (no, not kidding, Clevelanders are ‘hat-tippin’ folk, not many ppl realize this), closed the door, & drove off. Now, keep in mind that I was in the middle of a street, walking along. I know there’s a stop on the street just before, & just after, but not on this particular street in between them. Yeah, the word you’re lookin for is ‘ghetto-fabulous’.

Now, pair that w/ a few hours later, I get off of work, & stop at the corner store to pick up a couple of things. I hand the clerk a 20. And what does she do?!? She pulls out one of those ‘counterfeit money markers’ & checks the damn bill! Now, I shop here all the time (it’s just down the street from my house), have always used cash (they don’t take credit/debit), & have had her check me out before. I’ve never had her pull out “the marker” on me though! So, I’m attributing it to how ghetto-fabulous I looked yesterday.

Obviously, the bus driver liked my ghetto-fabulushness, while the woman (who should’ve recognized me) in my own neighborhood did most def did NOT.

UPDATE: Looking back & re-reading what I'd written, I can see how it may come off a little superficial, but that’s not really how I had meant it. It was just a weird day, & that whole experience of the day kept going round & round in my mind. It was kinda unsettling to me. I was bothered that in one part of town, I was offered a favor, & I was looked down upon in another. All b/c of the way I was dressed & carrying myself; mind you, I wasn’t dressed trashy or anything. But simply based on appearance, one person was being kind to me, & another looked disgusted at me.

Then, one of my closest friends posted about how stupid all these clichéd sayings are. And she’s right, they are. And I started thinking about the whole “beauty being only skin deep”, but that’s not how we treat each other. We treat pretty ppl much better than ordinary or ‘not-so-pretty’ ppl. Cause most days I look normal, I just happened to have looked a tad bit nicer that one day.

see... size doesn't really matter

This is the funniest thing I've seen all day. I know that's not sayin much, b/c I've had an uneventful day. But I was just looking at stuff after checking my email & this is what I came across.

The cat you see there is Jack; weighing in at 15 pounds. A neighbor saw this & just thought that the cat was just watching the bear. But then the bear climbed down, & Jack the cat chased it up another tree!!! Apparently it's a scaredy-bear (haha, 'scaredy-bear', haha, I crack myself UP!), & the cat's hissing scared him. Then, the cat's parents called him, & the bear ran away.

Here's the story on it.

bag-pipes

No, seriously, BAGPIPES! I was leaving work the other day, & I saw this guy in a green plaid kilt, walking back & forth in a parking lot, playing BAGPIPES.

There really is no mistaking the sound. So, I pulled out my cam, & snapped a shot.
Now, I wasn't entirely sure that this was gonna come out; me being so far away from him. So, I got in my car, & drove around to the entrance of the parking lot he was in. But there were 2 cop cars already up the driveway, one horse-cop trotting up, & another cop car behind the horse-copper, about to pull into the same drive. So, I just drove off. I figured it had to be one of those "nothin to see here, folks" type situations. Also, the horse stunk. Worse than "circus-elephant stink". It was pretty bad. So, I just went on home.

I guess bagpipes are the new thing here in C-town. Someone told me a local high school had bagpipes playing for their commencement ceremonies. You know, instead of that regular/standard commencement march-piece?

Here's a close-up of the pic. On the right is the bag-piper (bag-pipee?), & on the left, you can see a cop walking up to him.And I know y'all are thinking that you didn't realize how beautiful the greenery in Cleveland is. I know, no one talks about how gorgeous it is here. We have great weather most of the time. Ppl are just haters & talk smack about this great city all the time. You can see how beautiful & lush even our parking lots are in that 1st pic.

I do love my digital camera. I think I'm in love w/ it!

I love Google's personality...

...and as we all know, personality goes a long way. Here's Google's logo just for today, b/c it's Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's b-day:










Here are a couple of previous ones, the one on the left for Easter, & the right was a braille one they came up with:

Moses, Clay, & hygiene

Why do ppl name their kids “Clay”? I think even “Moses” is a better name than “Clay” for a boy. It’s distinguished & is a “man’s name” definitely. Clay is smooshy stuff on the ground & synonymous w/ dirt. It’s their call what they want to name their kids, but I would def prefer Moses over Clay as a boy’s name. This came up today, b/c I actually dealt w/ a real live young boy (not man) by the name of Clay. And a few weeks ago, I know a lot of ppl were worked up cause Gwynie named her boy Moses. I’m cool w/ it, I think Moses is a grand name for a young man. I wouldn’t want it to become one of the popular boy’s names, but few & far between, it’s ok.

This whole thing reminded me of last year around this same time, when I got on a rant about ppl naming their kid “Jeanne”. If you name a baby "Jeanne", then as that baby grows up, and ppl talk to her, they will be saying "Hi Jeanne" but it will come out "hygiene". Why do that to your kid? Don’t you love your baby?! I thought ppl were supposed to love their kids & be totally in love/smitten/ all that good-stuff w/ their children.